As a favour to you: [Archive]

MMike

08-20-2007, 10:14 PM

I give you some advice. I just returned from Seattle yesterday. Tied up almost entirley with my wife's family stuff.

In my two year absence, I had forgotten about your (the collective you), near-clinical inability to operate motor vehicles effectively. So let me bestow some of my Quebec driving expertise upon you. And for those who didn't know, Quebec is renowned for being a more frightening driving experience for tourists than L.A.

1) Sit in the seat, hold onto the circle in front of you, push on the pedals.

2) Hey you! Yes you! In the pick-up truck doing 57 mph in the left lane! Move the FACK over!!

3) The clear wet liquid that falls from the sky, will not harm your vehicle. Nor will sporadically hammering on the brake help you out.

4) Hey you two! Yeah....the two of you glued door handle to door handle...doing 57 mph. Get a room already and the hell out of my way!!

5) and I've used this before.....You turn signal has no effect on my brakes. Just because you've indicated does not mean that you have room to change lanes......especially when you're tangling with a Quebecker who is 5'9", 150 lbs with a "small man" chip on his shoulder, driving a fully insured rental car.

6) An oldie but no less true: You are suposed to SPEED UP when merging into traffic. Coming to a stop, (with your indicator on) "waiting for room to pull in" ain't gonna work............especially when you're tangling with a Quebecker who is 5'9", 150 lbs with a "small man" chip on his shoulder, driving a fully insured rental car.

7) when on the freeway, DO NOT COME TO A STOP to let in a moron who does no know how to merge!

MMike

08-20-2007, 10:18 PM

My fully insured rental car: (It's a long story)

http://www.fotothing.com/photos/62c/62c5422af25db8eaa6d47352554acf7c.jpg

muddy beast

08-20-2007, 10:27 PM

haha I hear that man...but the bad drivers are everywhere, not just here!

Hell, I came back from whistler yesterday...we got stuck behind someone doing 25 on a 40 and braking EVERY corner...on a swervy road!!!!

ughh.

freeridefool

08-20-2007, 10:29 PM

number 5 really has a place in my heart. thank you for the laughs

V-Dub GTI

08-20-2007, 10:34 PM

Try driving in Richmond VA, the suckeist[sp?] drivers in all the land!

oly

08-20-2007, 10:41 PM

Try Driving in China.... Or for that matter, just try being a passenger first. You'll appreciate life here much more....

Str8OutaBallard

08-20-2007, 11:10 PM

Try driving a right hand driver while buzzed around a 5 lane turnabout during rush hour in Paris!

or just go back to Quebec and shut the F*up...

theres some Seattle "courtesy" for yo dumb a$$... now get over yourself

bockner

08-20-2007, 11:24 PM

Yeah the drives here suck with a capital SUCK......lived in NYC and the taxis had better driving skills and etiquette....hell even Connecticut has better drivers (trust me thats saying alot!)....plus....and I am saying this for all of us..."HEY HONEY HANG UP THE F'ing CELL PHONE!"

jumping_jesus

08-20-2007, 11:35 PM

the problem with drivers in seattle is that they are to afraid to go over 30mph. and you all complain about the traffic up here at least it constantly moves at 20-30mph during rush hour in la it takes 2 hours to go 30 miles. and the traffic up here would go a lot faster if you all just remembered the gas pedal is on the right.

Five

08-21-2007, 12:21 AM

Try Driving in China.... Or for that matter, just try being a passenger first. You'll appreciate life here much more....

Haha! :clapping:

ffonsok

08-21-2007, 01:16 AM

damn i hate when drivers are in the left lane, doing just over the speed limit. I don't give a **** if you're doing 70 in a 65, maybe I want to do 95. If you see me in your rearview mirror riding your ass, move the **** over. NO, DONT ****ING SLOW DOWN WHEN I FLASH MY HIGH BEAMS AT YOU. MOVE YOUR PUSSY ASS OVER.

oh and by the way, you're in America now. It's spelled favor, not favour. See! Even spell check puts a little red mark under "favour".

MMike

08-21-2007, 04:42 AM

And some Seattle literacy too apparently..... You just keep on keepin' it real in Ballard....

theres some Seattle "courtesy" for yo dumb a$$... now get over yourself

MMike

08-21-2007, 04:45 AM

Oh yeah

8) If a State trooper has someone else pulled over already, YOU don't have to stop.

9) If you are travelleing north on I-5, and a state trooper heading south is speeding along with his lights on, you DON'T HAVE TO STOP!

Certified Drunk

08-21-2007, 09:33 AM

Come on Mike, where's number 10?

-----------> Move Right ---------->

geargrrl

08-21-2007, 10:23 AM

come back when it snows 1/2".

MMike

08-21-2007, 10:28 AM

come back when it snows 1/2".

You forget I lived there for more than 6 years..........

(I can't believe I've been gone for more than 3)

And to be fair, damn it was nice to be back there for a while. I'll be honest, Seattle (the city itself) is not my favourite town. But for the outdoorsy stuff.....damn I miss it...despite the poor drivers. It is a beautiful part of the world.

Serial Midget

08-21-2007, 02:21 PM

Your vasectomy was a favour for the entire world. :)

SnowboardinWA

08-21-2007, 06:13 PM

Toshi

08-22-2007, 01:42 AM

i wish seattle drivers knew the difference between low and high beams. :(

Str8OutaBallard

08-22-2007, 06:55 PM

And some Seattle literacy too apparently..... You just keep on keepin' it real in Ballard....

There I go again typing w/my **inside voice**

MinorThreat

08-23-2007, 11:09 AM

damn i hate when drivers are in the left lane, doing just over the speed limit. I don't give a **** if you're doing 70 in a 65, maybe I want to do 95. I always figured if I'm already doing over and some schmo behinds me wants to go even faster that's his own problem to figure out how he's going to achieve that. YOU go around; then you can add dodging in and out of traffic to speeding and hopefully catch the attention of the constabulary :)

Certified Drunk

08-23-2007, 11:25 AM

I've always liked the person driving in the left lane that moves over and as soon as you pass they get back in the left lane. WHY?

muddy beast

08-23-2007, 11:51 AM

I like it when people speed up after you pass them...makes total sence!

*cough*

MMike

08-23-2007, 12:00 PM

Ah....so YOU'RE the one.....

You actually are in the wrong you know....

I always figured if I'm already doing over and some schmo behinds me wants to go even faster that's his own problem to figure out how he's going to achieve that. YOU go around; then you can add dodging in and out of traffic to speeding and hopefully catch the attention of the constabulary :)

MinorThreat

08-23-2007, 12:31 PM

Ah....so YOU'RE the one.....

You actually are in the wrong you know....Not if I'm passing other people in the other two lanes so that it would be pointless to pull over just to accommodate someone violating worse than I am; or if I'm in the car pool lane already overtaking someone else.

MMike

08-23-2007, 12:59 PM

But when you are done passing, you should get out of the PASSING lane so that you yourself can be passed. I'm willing to wait for the guy ahead to wait for a spot to move over. But to drive in the left lane indefinitely is wrong.

Where you also aware that on a two lane hwy, if you have something like 5 cars stacked up behind you, you're supposed to move onto the shoulder to let them pass?

ffonsok

08-23-2007, 01:18 PM

Not if I'm passing other people in the other two lanes so that it would be pointless to pull over just to accommodate someone violating worse than I am; or if I'm in the car pool lane already overtaking someone else.

I'll pass you on the shoulder then. That'll give you a jolt.

MinorThreat

08-23-2007, 01:25 PM

But when you are done passing, you should get out of the PASSING lane so that you yourself can be passed. I'm willing to wait for the guy ahead to wait for a spot to move over. But to drive in the left lane indefinitely is wrong.
I'm aware of all of that. YOU are aware that going 95 anywhere is illegal and usually dangerous, right?

Where you also aware that on a two lane hwy, if you have something like 5 cars stacked up behind you, you're supposed to move onto the shoulder to let them pass?One of my pet peeves; I've commuted on a two-lane with few places to pass every day for nearly 30 years and I HATE getting behind bozos who are terrified of twisty roads and won't go at least the speed limit.

On the other hand, I've been a volunteer fireman for nearly 25 years, was an EMT for about 10 and have scraped more than my share of people off the pavement in that time; so I tend to try to lead by example and drive (more-or-less) legal and keep myself to (most of the time) only 5 over.

Snacks

08-23-2007, 01:28 PM

MMike

08-23-2007, 02:07 PM

It's not up to you to police the freeways and keep people driving at the speed you want them to. If I get caught, it's my problem.

I'm aware of all of that. YOU are aware that going 95 anywhere is illegal and usually dangerous, right?

One of my pet peeves; I've commuted on a two-lane with few places to pass every day for nearly 30 years and I HATE getting behind bozos who are terrified of twisty roads and won't go at least the speed limit.

On the other hand, I've been a volunteer fireman for nearly 20 years, was an EMT for about 10 and have scraped more than my share of people off the pavement in that time; so I tend to try to lead by example and drive (more-or-less) legal and keep myself to (most of the time) only 5 over.

scottjustscott

08-23-2007, 02:33 PM

:stupid:

What about the people that weave in and out of traffic while going over the speed limit but won't go into the HOV lane to pass anyone? As if speeding in the HOV lane is worse that speeding and weaving in the regular lanes.

Kornphlake

08-23-2007, 02:56 PM

You should visit Salt Lake City Utah or even worse Provo/Orem if you think Seattle is bad.

MinorThreat

08-23-2007, 03:17 PM

It's against the law to drive in the left hand lane if you are not passing, regarless of the speed you are going.I know that - - as I stated above - - and I don't. But if I'm overtaking traffic myself I'm out in the left lane doing it. And if I'm overtaking a line of cars going slower than I am and I'm already doing 70+ in the 65 zone, I'm not going to dodge into an open space in the slower line of cars just because some hothead wants to continue at 85 unabated. Not my problem; not my responsibility.

It's not up to you to police the freeways and keep people driving at the speed you want them to. If I get caught, it's my problem.Oh I don't. But I'm not going to go out of my way to placate the thoughtless driving of others either. And it's too bad "getting caught" is your only concern governing your driving habits.

Hmmm... I thought this was a mountain bike forum?

Certified Drunk

08-23-2007, 04:47 PM

This is the ROAD RAGE FORUM!

HATE!
HATE!
HATE!

ffonsok

08-23-2007, 05:30 PM

This is the ROAD RAGE FORUM!

HATE!
HATE!
HATE!

start the chant

HATE!
HATE!
HATE!
HATE!

Skookum

08-23-2007, 08:34 PM

Seattle drivers are fine, it's just all these frikkin people who aren't from here, that screw it all up.

Yes it's twooooooooo00000000oooooo....

Toshi

08-23-2007, 10:00 PM

You should visit Salt Lake City Utah or even worse Provo/Orem if you think Seattle is bad.

amen. SLC is hell for many reasons, one of which is the drivers.

:busted:

(i'd still live there just for the skiing tho)

jumping_jesus

08-23-2007, 11:19 PM

I always figured if I'm already doing over and some schmo behinds me wants to go even faster that's his own problem to figure out how he's going to achieve that. YOU go around; then you can add dodging in and out of traffic to speeding and hopefully catch the attention of the constabulary :)

You know passing on the right is ILLEGAL you dork :huh: !!! Your the person that gets pissed when some is speeding in the fast lane you know the FAST lane they call it that for a reason. You also must be the person I LOVE looking in the eye as I pass and flip the good old number 1 to and then you act surprised as to why your getting the finger :twitch: bummer

jumping_jesus

08-23-2007, 11:21 PM

Seattle drivers are fine, it's just all these frikkin people who aren't from here, that screw it all up.

Yes it's twooooooooo00000000oooooo....

hhhhmmmm i can see that too

trailhacker

08-24-2007, 12:45 AM

...no comment....
Seattle drivers are fine

trailhacker

08-24-2007, 12:49 AM

"WA state law, keep right except to pass"
I bet this law is broken almost as much as the speed limit?!?

And don't get me started on "Vehicles 10,000 lbs or pulling a trailer prohibited in left lane" (applies to any highway with three or more lanes) - this includes YOU with the ski boat or trailer full of dirt bikes!

Fredzilla

08-24-2007, 01:22 AM

Drivers suck everywhere, it's a proven fact.

MinorThreat

08-24-2007, 01:33 AM

You know passing on the right is ILLEGAL you dork :huh: !!! Your the person that gets pissed when some is speeding in the fast lane you know the FAST lane they call it that for a reason. You also must be the person I LOVE looking in the eye as I pass and flip the good old number 1 to and then you act surprised as to why your getting the finger :twitch: bummer
So much anger over doing something stupid and wrong (speeding). Of course it's wrong to pass on the right. So don't. Go a reasonable speed and then you won't have the compulsion to.

I'm clear of this thread; it's just an argument and (hopefully) your behavior will change when you mature. And no, I'm just the person who is weary of scraping your type off the rock faces and trees and extricating from mangled wreckage or, worst of all, someone else who you left in your wake.

MMike

08-24-2007, 05:36 AM

I'm clear of this thread; it's just an argument and (hopefully) your behavior will change when you mature. And no, I'm just the person who is weary of scraping your type off the rock faces and trees and extricating from mangled wreckage or, worst of all, someone else who you left in your wake.

I'll be 37 next month....I f I haven't matured by now I doubt it will ever happen.

Anf if you're weary of it, then maybe you chose the wrong line of work. That's not our fault.

This is a weird feeling....for possibly the first time ever, I'm not the biggest jerk posting in a thread......

Certified Drunk

08-24-2007, 10:18 AM

What about these dill holes who dont use mud flaps?
If the body of your vehicle is above the center of your axle you are required to use mud flaps.

Serial Midget

08-24-2007, 02:11 PM

This is a weird feeling....for possibly the first time ever, I'm not the biggest jerk posting in a thread......

You're no Jed... whatever his screen was. :monkey:

Hmmm - I seem to suck at Internent insults.

MMike

08-24-2007, 02:39 PM

Ooohhhhhh....I get it now.... I saw this out of order...

Serial Midget

08-24-2007, 06:05 PM

Ooohhhhhh....I get it now.... I saw this out of order...

I'm obtuse. :happydance:

MMike

08-24-2007, 10:25 PM

I'm obtuse. :happydance:

You exceed 90 degrees, but are less than 180?

Netguy

08-25-2007, 12:23 AM

Serial Midget

08-25-2007, 09:42 PM

You exceed 90 degrees, but are less than 180?

Yes. Hot but not untouchable. :brows:

Jr_Bullit

08-27-2007, 10:52 AM

amusing thread - and so very true :) - I hope you PNWers saw this in your local paper today:
http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/local/329092_honk27.html

No more honky honky....yea right!

MMike

08-27-2007, 11:30 AM

Why does this have to be about race???

Secret Squirrel

08-27-2007, 11:34 AM

amusing thread - and so very true :) - I hope you PNWers saw this in your local paper today:
http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/local/329092_honk27.html

No more honky honky....yea right!

I get around this law by just leaning out the window and shouting "Hey f*ckwad, move your b*tch-ass!!!" That seems to work quite well. If it doesn't, I just whip out the 6' Schlong of Death and wonk 'em up side the head.

coiler7

08-28-2007, 02:55 PM

its not a race, just some of us like to get where we're going without some jerk cutting us off or blindly merging onto the freeway going 45 mph.
anyway, hey thanks to secret squirrel i got some really great new phrases to add to my list & yell out towards the morons i encounter around where i work in Puyallup. then there's Kent/Covington where I live - yes, my fault i know!!! anyway, road rage is a good thing sometimes, especially w/ all the damn foreigners barely off the boat who need a lesson or two. Don't honk - cuss the bastards out!
RIDE ON!!!
:bonk:
:banghead:
:rant:

MMike

08-29-2007, 04:37 AM

Yeah....friggin foreigners.... and they can like barely speak english!! What the hell is wrong with their parents, teaching them a useless language that nobody speaks????

Secret Squirrel

08-29-2007, 10:28 AM

^^ Shaddup frenchie...

coiler7

08-29-2007, 10:34 AM

hey even if you're from quebec, no offense to you personally mike (and any BC's, too) but you know what i'm talkin bout. damn friggin foreigners basically taking their drivers education on our roads, for like their first 5 yrs. most them type cabbies are OK, usually good drivers after like 3 yrs. - unless they're Montreal, i've noticed. now kinda different but take my Ontarian friend who has dual-citizenship, great driver, hardly an accent & he's even a gun-owning NRA conservative, like me. anyway, don't forget road rage is necessary for balance. now go out on your commuter bike & spit on some windshields!
RIDE On & Peace out
:clapping: